Not your problem.

sep 17, 2019 | Coaching, English

‘I think I should learn how to delegate more’, she tells me.

It’s our fourth conversation.

This powerful businesswoman is doing really well, having a lot of crazy insights, and the anxiety around her fresh relationship that was the reason she contacted me, vanished completely during our first session.

I’ve just asked her if there’s anything else she’d like to work on, and this was her answer.

‘… learn how to delegate more, and learn how to say NO to new projects.’

It sounds like a reasonable request, a thing you could actually change successfully by talking about borders and guarding personal perimeters, by setting strict agendas and install apps and write down intentions and maybe even do some mindful stuff.

But then it occurs to me to ask a simple question.

‘Do you like working hard?’

Without hesitation she agrees fiercely, her eyes start to twinkle.

‘I love it’ she says, ‘I LOVE the professional juggling, the creativity involved, the buzz, the joy of the challenge, the Newness!’

‘Cool’, I reply. ‘So why would you want to change anything about that?’

She falls silent.

I go on.

‘Do you get annoyed a lot lately, are you having a hard time relaxing in the weekend, do you have trouble sleeping, are you feeling exhausted, do you experience physical pain?’

‘No, no, no, no, and no. But people always tell me I take on too much work and then they look concerned…’

‘But are they talking about how THEY would feel about having your workload, or is it too much for YOU?’

She shakes her head and smiles even more.

‘Nobody has ever asked me that before!’

I smile back at her.

‘Well, I guess you might be suffering from severe enthusiasm!’

(We’re running out of problems.)