The way out.

I ask her if she’s aware of the fact that other people’s opinions about her, are not really about her.

‘Yeah’, she tells me. ‘I know.’

And then I ask her why, if she knows that it’s not really about her, all these outside opinions are STILL confusing and painful and something to take into account and worry about.


She doesn’t know.

She has never really thought about that, never explored it or stepped away from it long enough to learn something worthwhile.

And this is exactly where most of us go wrong all the time:

We know things but that bag of worldly ideas doesn’t really help us live a nicer life.

We know it, but it doesn’t truly land.

A lot of stuff makes sense to us, we can explain it in great detail to our friends when they’re in a bad place, but we’re blind to what it means for ourselves.

All this obvious knowing that is so very logical and universal, just seems to evaporate as soon as emotions and feelings arise.

And maybe you even know THAT.

So why isn’t it helping you?

Why are you lost when you should have found by now?

Because we are way, way less practical and factual than we think.

Because we get easily swept away by thoughts and feelings, all day long.

Because we don’t know we can take a different position in our human experience.

Now I’ve talked about this many times before, and I’ll probably keep talking about if forever, because I know this is your way out.

Out of the doubts, the self-criticism, the addictions and the suffering, and into the peace, the confidence, the ease.

Stepping out of the mere factual knowing into the direct being, the observing, even just for a moment, opens up endless options.

Right now, we are looking straight from freedom into the dark depths of the mind, and we get totally lost in there, without realizing what’s going on.

Which is sad, and weird, and somehow also beautiful and special.

By being aware of what happens in the moment and by not getting caught up in it, we can finally use what we already know.

But in order to do that, to start entertaining that amazing freedom that is waiting for us, we have to realize that what we have been doing all this time is not really going anywhere.

What we know is mostly useless and powerless when our habits and unconscious behavior so easily take over.

We have to really see that what we know is not worth shit, as long as we just leave it in our minds and not let it become part of our consciousness.


I talk about life like I know what it really is.

Of course I don’t.

I know nothing, not really.

But at least I am very much aware of THAT, and it makes all the difference.

Let’s hope life can be more like that for you.

Wishing you a deliciously ignorant day.



(Photo by @sagefriedman, for Unsplash)

Zuipen op zondag.

Zuipen op zondag.

Never the same.

Never the same.