I am not the only ‘me’ in the world.
In fact: all the human pawns in my life are me’s themselves.
How beautiful and magical and difficult and crazy to realize that every person we will ever meet has their own rich experience of life, an immersive 360 thing that is just as complex and rich and touching as what you and I live through each day, just as personal, and intimate, and real.
We are all me’s getting around, trying to make the best of it, hoping to make sense of the world by believing particular stories, trying to control them, to feel safe, and to find love and joy and happiness somewhere along the line.
We all have our own ways of doing it, and our ways always seem more important and plausible than all the other ones of all the other me’s.
As I look down my window, watching the busy street I live next to in Amsterdam, I see all the me’s passing by, in cars, on bikes, walking, in a hurry, slowly, laughing, closed off, with babies, with worries, whistling or watching their phones, most of them on their way to something today, and something bigger tomorrow.
Me, me, me, me, and another me.
The only life we will ever feel when in the character we get to play right now, is the life of that specific me.
We are all pawns (albeit amazing and touching ones), playing our part, doing the things that come with being who we are and thinking what we think, and all the pawns in the world are incredibly important for the unfolding of everything.
It’s sometimes so hard to get an appreciation for other pawns, when the experience of my life seems very important and real and complicated and distracting, so totally In My Face.
I can be SO lost in my own life, that I simply don’t see all the other perceived centers of the universe around me, doing their thing, trying hard or not so hard, living the same illusion in a different way, trying to fit in perfectly or do the exact opposite.
We are all the same in this one-sided personal experience, we all live lives that nobody will ever understand, yet we have to be with each other and somehow work it out.
I love us, the me’s.
Not always, and not always unconditionally (you know how it goes…) but right now I do, and right now just happens to be important to me.
You and me and the neighbors are all perfect me’s, incredibly amazing me’s living life as best as we can, based on what we know, doing the things we believe in, whatever those things are.
We share one planet, one sun, one life and one consciousness, but so many times it seems that we are not willing or able to see and accept that.
In this moment, right here and now, it feels really important to realize all of this, even if it’s too big and to miraculous to truly understand.
But it softens up my me towards the me’s that are passing by, and I like that.
Although I may not always feel it, or think it (let alone say it): I really and deeply appreciate the me that you are.
You are an incredible me.
Apart from your ideas that collide with mine, I know that we are truly the same on a fundamental level.
And I want to acknowledge that while I am in this feeling.
You make my being on earth complete, you, the me that now and then brushes against the Marnix me, the me that dances dizzily around the planet and sometimes gets so close we can almost touch each other.
And we can, and we do.
And we should.
You touch me, and I hope I touch you.
This is what we have and what we are: a bunch of me’s, totally lost most of the time, but pretending really hard to know what’s going on.
We need one another.
We should have each other’s back.
So thank you for being the me that you are.
Life wouldn’t be the same without you.
(Photo by @dylu, for Unsplash)